I agree that everyone is capable of change, if they are willing to look at themselves to make those changes.

I like the point of it being a win win, if a narc unearths your insecurities, but only if this is something that you then work on for yourself, rather than perpetuate a maladapted cycle. Because sadly, no matter how much pain someone will experience, it doesn't mean they will address it.

As in my piece, you don't need to hide your attachment if it means you are not buying into the narcissistic behaviour. It can be healthy for a narc or someone with tendencies to feel attached as it can open them up to a different relationship and help them to let go of their defences.